Browsing All posts tagged under »relationships«

The Call of Duty: Your Heart May Call, the Beloved Isn’t Obliged To Answer.

February 3, 2014


Recently, I ended up on the wanting end of a “I-want-more-than-you-want” affair. Contrary to what you might expect, it was a pretty positive experience. Things worked out well for two reasons. First, and most importantly, she was upfront and very clear about what she wanted — or did not want — at this point in […]

The Relationship Calculation: What Motivates Your Pair-Bond?

January 27, 2014


For most of human history, a pair-bond between humans has almost always been a kind of business deal, whether the deal was struck by two families on behalf of the prospective business partners or by the partners themselves. In this model, the pair-bond is normally expected to be created by the agreement to share the […]

Ain’t Nothing but Mammals: Do the Reasons for Attachment Matter?

January 20, 2014


A friend recently made the point to me that a woman’s decision to go home with a man on any given night might be something that simply happens, without explanation, and for no particular reason. I’ve been trying to figure out why I find the plausibility of this claim unsettling. On the face of it, […]

Philia v. Eros: What (How Deep) is Your Love?

November 5, 2011


For all women, there is at least one person she is meant to love with all her heart and not to desire sexually. For all men, there is at least one person he is meant to love with all his heart and not to desire sexually. Depending on a person’s sexuality, it will either be […]

She’s So High Above Me: The Satisfaction of Inequality.

October 29, 2011


Recent research suggests that the best marriages involve women who are more physically attractive than their mates. Men, the research indicates, are more supportive when they partner with a woman who is more attractive; women, it is claimed, care less about looks and more about having a supportive partner. Women also are said to mirror […]

Love Needs Something To Conquer, If It’s To Conquer All.

October 23, 2011


I’ve been thinking about my past romantic relationships and I think I see a pattern. In all my serious relationships, there always seems to be an insurmountable obstacle to overcome — like she wants something out of life I’m pretty sure I don’t or vice versa. At first, I thought this pattern might be symptomatic […]

Life Not Imitating Art and Why It Should: The Possibility of It

July 15, 2009


I was very fortunate to attend Wilfrid Laurier University at a time when Dr. Leslie O’Dell arranged to have Janet Wright direct a play starring Ted Follows. He was supported by a gaggle of undergrads. I had a fairly minor part and didn’t interact too often with Mr. Follows on- or off-stage; even so, he provided […]

Two Songs That Ruined My Understanding of What Women Want: “You’re So Vain” and “The Sweater”

May 13, 2009


I humbly submit that two songs, one by Meryn Cadell and one by Carly Simon, are directly responsible for my lifelong misunderstanding of what most women really want and admire in a man. Perhaps, I should sue? If you were similarly damaged, maybe we could start a class action suit? I am sure these songs affected both […]

Reflections on Theatre Replacement’s Bioboxes: Choose An Unparalleled Shared Experience

April 28, 2009


Theatre Replacement’s BioBoxes combines a clever concept with impressive performances and, in doing so, it offers people an opportunity for an unparalleled shared experience (click here for details). Not only is Bioboxes entertaining, I think it affected my whole outlook on theatre, on the performing arts, and on life. Not bad for six ten-minute stories performed one-on-one inside an […]

An Important Discovery. October 2008. A Sunday. Nine-ish.

December 17, 2008


1. Other persons, despite some similarities, are not like me. I am unlikely to make proper sense of a person’s understanding of the world (unexpressed or otherwise), her intentions, or her behavior, if I assume it is always like or identical to my own. It is possible to make sense of another person’s understanding of […]


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